To help make this introduction make sense, I want to inform you that my current job is working for the certain hospital in their mental health ward.
It is interesting to tell people about what I do for a job. Different expressions ranging from appreciation to concern to the most common reaction of shock and wonder. Sadly, my explanation is often equally as varied as the responses of my listeners. I they they respond in reverence, I explain with equal reverence. If they respond in humor, I then explain in an equal sense of humor. Is this right? No. No it's not. It's not right because it does not give honor where honor is due. It's not right because it does not properly explain what I feel about the place I work.
I work with veterans, men and women who at some point in their lives decided that this country was worth their lives. I see patients who were shot in the head and have sense lost the mental capacity to function normally in society. I see patients who are homeless and have lost their families, their homes, their jobs, and all because they're mentally unstable. I see patients who are drug addicts, alcoholics, lesbians, gays, straight trans-genders, suicidal, homicidal, violent, people who hate God and people who think they are God. But the, hands down, number one symptom I witness in people who come in as my patients has to be depression. Debilitated by their own sense of worthlessness they have ceased to have any tangible value of life. Their loss was given when they're loved ones gave up on them. Their brokenness was when the nation they served betrayed them and rejected them as people. Their scars did not come from a grenade or the devastating blow of a piercing bullet, but by a knives edge carving its mark in the wrist of a broken veteran. The war is never over, ever-repeating itself in ways unnoticed by the general public. The "crazy" homeless man yelling at himself wanders the streets of Portland with no wheelchair capable of supporting a paralysed mind. This is the cost of freedom.
There was another cost for an entirely different freedom...
Being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground(a).He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. He was wounded for our transgressions; He was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the punishment that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth. By oppression and judgment he was taken away. He was assigned a grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death, though he had done no violence, nor was any deceit in his mouth(b). They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head. They put a staff in his right hand and knelt in front of him and mocked him. They spit on him, and took the staff and struck him on the head again and again(c). He carried our cross up a hill where the soldiers drove nails through his hands and feet, he hung there until he died and to insure his death a guard pierced his heart through his side with a spear. There is no doubt that he was dead.
And to prove that his sacrifice was acceptable to God, the Lord raised Jesus back from the dead, arguably the most important truth in all of Christianity.
This is a different, more excellent and most desireable freedom, that only comes through faith in the very death and resurrection of the God who went through all of that to put His love on display for mankind and the salvation of all who will believe.
Freedom cost God everything-- and me nothing-- so that I might have everything and forever be with God.
Thank you Jesus,
(a) Luke 22
(b) Selected verse of Isaiah 53.
(c) Matthew 27
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
It's Alive...
For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews IV:12
One of the things I like most about reading the Scripture is that it's alive. It speaks in ways that ring different to my soul, and convicts me like nothing else I've ever known. When I am left to my own self examination I am caught up in a wave of self pity and condemnation. Dismay is a word that would properly describe the thoughts that are often associated it with my depression. But the word of God is so the very opposite of my thinking. It corrects my thinking, it strips the errors of my mind and replenishes my head with God's thoughts. It is when I am not in the Scripture that I begin to think and feel and worry myself with what goes in the world about me. And even when I am shrinking away from God the Scripture speaks truth into my life and redirects me towards my Maker.
The Bible teaches that God in is holy wisdom, made man in his very image. A finite creature would become responsible for bearing the very image of the Living God and have a relationship with Him. Man chose rather to defy the authority of God and live his own life, in all the same way we often live our lives today. As a result God frustrated the hearts of man in regards to our relationships, with animals, each other and even God himself. The same holy God could not have anything to do with the things that are in contradiction to himself, ie that which is unholy. But as a loving God, He chose to not leave us in our depravity but in His master plan was going to provide a way for us to be reunited to the original purpose.
His plan, being Jesus himself, came to earth teaching some very frustrating things,
“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder,a and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell."
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matthew V:20-22; 27-28
This is frustrating because if moral perfection is the means by which we get to heaven, then all of us are guilty and worthy of Hell. Even if we could clean up our lives and turn from all sin and live a "moral" life... we could still do nothing to clear the guilt of our past, a past we are still very much responsible for. Matthew V:20-22; 27-28
Why would God frustrate us? To draw us closer to Himself. This life is not impossible with Jesus, only alone is living well, by His standards, a very impossible thing to do.
In my sin I seek to hide myself, sin always causes isolation, but the word of God brings the light of God into my heart and reveals the darkness therein. But this is never to my despair, the Light loving leads me to repentance.
Thank you Jesus for giving us Your word, for caring enough about your creation to not leave us in the dark as to your character and will, but choosing rather to reveal yourself to us through this book. I ask that You open eyes that are shut, ears that are deaf, and hearts that are stone cold and bring life back into the dead. I pray for myself in this as well, i know how much i need you, but i am so easily entertained by the world that i live in, draw close to me father, be my ever present help when I'm in trouble.
Amen.
One of the things I like most about reading the Scripture is that it's alive. It speaks in ways that ring different to my soul, and convicts me like nothing else I've ever known. When I am left to my own self examination I am caught up in a wave of self pity and condemnation. Dismay is a word that would properly describe the thoughts that are often associated it with my depression. But the word of God is so the very opposite of my thinking. It corrects my thinking, it strips the errors of my mind and replenishes my head with God's thoughts. It is when I am not in the Scripture that I begin to think and feel and worry myself with what goes in the world about me. And even when I am shrinking away from God the Scripture speaks truth into my life and redirects me towards my Maker.
The Bible teaches that God in is holy wisdom, made man in his very image. A finite creature would become responsible for bearing the very image of the Living God and have a relationship with Him. Man chose rather to defy the authority of God and live his own life, in all the same way we often live our lives today. As a result God frustrated the hearts of man in regards to our relationships, with animals, each other and even God himself. The same holy God could not have anything to do with the things that are in contradiction to himself, ie that which is unholy. But as a loving God, He chose to not leave us in our depravity but in His master plan was going to provide a way for us to be reunited to the original purpose.
His plan, being Jesus himself, came to earth teaching some very frustrating things,
“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder,a and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell."
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matthew V:20-22; 27-28
This is frustrating because if moral perfection is the means by which we get to heaven, then all of us are guilty and worthy of Hell. Even if we could clean up our lives and turn from all sin and live a "moral" life... we could still do nothing to clear the guilt of our past, a past we are still very much responsible for. Matthew V:20-22; 27-28
Why would God frustrate us? To draw us closer to Himself. This life is not impossible with Jesus, only alone is living well, by His standards, a very impossible thing to do.
In my sin I seek to hide myself, sin always causes isolation, but the word of God brings the light of God into my heart and reveals the darkness therein. But this is never to my despair, the Light loving leads me to repentance.
Thank you Jesus for giving us Your word, for caring enough about your creation to not leave us in the dark as to your character and will, but choosing rather to reveal yourself to us through this book. I ask that You open eyes that are shut, ears that are deaf, and hearts that are stone cold and bring life back into the dead. I pray for myself in this as well, i know how much i need you, but i am so easily entertained by the world that i live in, draw close to me father, be my ever present help when I'm in trouble.
Amen.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Thy Kingdom Come...
"The Kingdom of God is simply the place where God's will is being done." John Mark Comer - Solid Rock
Living for Jesus and allowing His kingdom to reign in my heart and mind was never something I could accomplish on my own. Neither is this something God does alone. Jesus says, "I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." John XV:5
What fruit do we bear?
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." Galatians V:22-23a
Loving those who love us is easy, loving our enemies is hard. Being happy is not difficult, having joy in all circumstances and trials comes from God. We don't white knuckle our way through life struggling for self control, that eventually fails. Neither can we produce true patience by clamping our teeth together and smiling. We can pretend that we're good, but wholesome goodness only comes from Jesus.
But I will often, and stupidly so, try to produce good fruit by my own strength. And the result? Ugliness. I don't suppose anyone can truly be a desciple of Messiah if they never read about Him. I mean the four gospels, the only authorataive writing on the life, ministry, death and ressurection of Jesus Christ. But to be honest I can't remember the last time i sat down and read one of them from beginning to end without interuption. That needs to change.
As I look back at 2010 I see a life that was for the most part me expanding my kingdom and living for Jason. I don't want to see this in 2011, I want this year to be a year marked by humility and submission to Jesus Christ and obedience to His word through daily devotion. I want to see His kingdom, where His will is done, in my life.
"Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil." Matthew VI:9-13
Living for Jesus and allowing His kingdom to reign in my heart and mind was never something I could accomplish on my own. Neither is this something God does alone. Jesus says, "I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." John XV:5
What fruit do we bear?
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." Galatians V:22-23a
Loving those who love us is easy, loving our enemies is hard. Being happy is not difficult, having joy in all circumstances and trials comes from God. We don't white knuckle our way through life struggling for self control, that eventually fails. Neither can we produce true patience by clamping our teeth together and smiling. We can pretend that we're good, but wholesome goodness only comes from Jesus.
But I will often, and stupidly so, try to produce good fruit by my own strength. And the result? Ugliness. I don't suppose anyone can truly be a desciple of Messiah if they never read about Him. I mean the four gospels, the only authorataive writing on the life, ministry, death and ressurection of Jesus Christ. But to be honest I can't remember the last time i sat down and read one of them from beginning to end without interuption. That needs to change.
As I look back at 2010 I see a life that was for the most part me expanding my kingdom and living for Jason. I don't want to see this in 2011, I want this year to be a year marked by humility and submission to Jesus Christ and obedience to His word through daily devotion. I want to see His kingdom, where His will is done, in my life.
"Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil." Matthew VI:9-13
Pride...
This one sin is most ugly. Hiding behind every other sin, it rests quietly in the shadows of my being, never accused, never repented of. Which is easier, to blame that which brought about the temptation, or to blame the sinful nature that allowed temptation to mature? i.e. myself. Pride is so ugly because it's so not very obvious.
When I'm afraid of what other people will think or say; pride.
When I'm insulted by the way someone treated me; pride.
When I begin to think that I'm better than somebody else; pride.
When I'm impressed by my own spirituality; pride.
When I think I know more than you, so I don't even bother to listen; pride.
When I think I can have victory over sin, without the help of God; PRIDE.
The last two I experience this week in bad ways. I did not want to listen to the wisdom of a friend because I had previously read this bible passage, I knew what he was talking about and where he was going with the conversation. Looking back on what he had to say, and what happened next in my life, I really should have paid more attention.
It is even more deceitful because it can effect every area of our life. I often only think of pride in the form of anger and spitefulness towards God usually expressed in people we call atheist. But what about the pride within the gates of religion? Remember the Romans who abused grace and used it as a means to sin more? This was centered around pride. How about the way we're not totally honest? Or perhaps when we come to church with nice clothes and a fake smile plastered on our faces? Or the way we talk more about our accomplishments, position and car we drive then we talk about our struggles and our hardships? Pride keeps us from being the people God wants us to be.
Father, I confess this sin to You. And I ask most sincerely that You help me recognize it and forsake it. When I stand without You, I fall. When I fall before You, You help me stand. Jesus I want to live Your way, I need Your help. Please guide me, Amen.
When I'm afraid of what other people will think or say; pride.
When I'm insulted by the way someone treated me; pride.
When I begin to think that I'm better than somebody else; pride.
When I'm impressed by my own spirituality; pride.
When I think I know more than you, so I don't even bother to listen; pride.
When I think I can have victory over sin, without the help of God; PRIDE.
The last two I experience this week in bad ways. I did not want to listen to the wisdom of a friend because I had previously read this bible passage, I knew what he was talking about and where he was going with the conversation. Looking back on what he had to say, and what happened next in my life, I really should have paid more attention.
It is even more deceitful because it can effect every area of our life. I often only think of pride in the form of anger and spitefulness towards God usually expressed in people we call atheist. But what about the pride within the gates of religion? Remember the Romans who abused grace and used it as a means to sin more? This was centered around pride. How about the way we're not totally honest? Or perhaps when we come to church with nice clothes and a fake smile plastered on our faces? Or the way we talk more about our accomplishments, position and car we drive then we talk about our struggles and our hardships? Pride keeps us from being the people God wants us to be.
Father, I confess this sin to You. And I ask most sincerely that You help me recognize it and forsake it. When I stand without You, I fall. When I fall before You, You help me stand. Jesus I want to live Your way, I need Your help. Please guide me, Amen.
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